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Engelsk stil, irsk fortelling


Birte

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har da fått oppgave å skrive en irsk fortelling, (hva det nå måtte være.) og her er resultatet :P

I have a dream - By Birte 9d

Once upon a time there was a poor family living in a basement on a farm outside London.

The mother and father were working on the farm, but they only got enough money for food and to pay for the overprised rent.

They also had a daughter named Victoria. Victoria had long, blond hair with curls all over it.

Because of the low wages the mother and father gained, they couldn't afford her an education.

And since they lived on a farm far away from the civilization she didnt have any friends either.

She was very miserable, and there was nothing no one could do about it.

Her parents taught her how to be a good farmer as they were. But Victoria didn't wanted

to become a farmer, her dream was to become a famous actress some day. Allthough she wasn't very optimistic, she

prayed every night hoping something or someone would get her away from this living hell.

Victoria came home from working outside at the farm, and she was exhausted! She got into her bedroom, and sat down by

the bed and prayed to God that he would help her. But as always, nothing happened.

She layed down on her bed crying, and suddenly, out of nowhere, a fairy appeared.

It was a gorgeous fairy, with a long white dress and it had purple flowers on it. The fairy held a magic wand in

her right hand and out of it, there came lots of gold and silvered glitter.

Victoria didn't believe her own eyes.

-Dont be afraid, I've comed to grant you two wishes, the fairy said kindly.

Victoria still couldn't believe it. She rubbed her eyes to make sure if it was a dream or not.

But it wasn't. The fairy was still to see.

-Two wishes, you said? Victoria was shaken in her voice and body.

-Yes, I've seen how miserable you are and you deserve so much better, sweetheart.

-ooh.. This is like a dream come true! Victoria had a big smile all around her face. You could even se her nose smiling.

But before Victoria got a chance to say her wish, someone woke her up.

-Victoria! Dinners ready! It was her mother.

Victoria realized that everything had been a dream, and it crushed her heart.

-Like I needed that, she thought to herself and went into the livingroom to eat her daily cup of vegetablesoup.

The sun went down, and the birds stopped kvittering. Victoria crawled in under her duvet, and just as she felt asleep,

the fairy came back.

-Hello my dear. I've comed back to grant you your two wishes. The fairy smiled and spun her magic wand.

Even though Victoria didn't believe it, she said her first wish, which was a raise for her parents.

-Your wish will come true, the fairy said as she spun her magic wand in slow sircles around Victorias head.

The next morning Victorias mum came in to the kitchen with a great smile on her face.

-What are you so happy about?, Victoria asked with a stupid expression on her face. She hadn't seen her mother smile

like that in ages.

-You will never believe this. I've gotten a raise!

-Wow, that's great, mother! Victoria was shocked. She and her parents gathered and they all hugged at once.

Finally, something good happened to the poor family.

-The dream did come true, thought Victoria to herself. But she started wondering if it only was a convincident or not.

This whole day Victoria had a feeling of happiness inside. A feeling she didn't even remembered having felt before.

The day went on, and she couldn't wait for the next night to come, hoping the fairy would show up.

And when the evening came, she fell asleep right away. But the next day she woke up, without any memories of a dream.

-Maybe it was a convincident afterall. Victoria was deeply dissapointed.

Days and nights went by. Still no dreams. After a while she gave up the thought of the fairy to return and give

her her remaining wish. But the same night, the fairy showed up.

-Hello dear. I've been very busy lately, I'm afraid. But of course you should get the last wish I've promised you.

Victoria looked up from her duvet and saw the beautiful fairy.

-Ok, here's my last wish. I've been thinking about it since the first time you came to me! And now, I've decided that

this is what I want to do.

Victoria said her wish, the fairy spun her magic wand and they both dissapeared.

Now, Victoria have the best job she could ever imagen. Even better than to be an actress.

Every night, she flyes all around the world, making miserable people happy. She even has a white long dress with purple

flowers on it, and she always bring her magic wand with sparkling glitter coming out of it.

--------------------

hvis du orket å lese hele, setter jeg veldig stor pris på om noen med litt mer engelskunnskaper enn meg kunne pirket litt :D Både på ord og sammensetninger av ord.. takk på forhånd :P I really appreciate it

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Nå får jeg grave frem litt kunskaper her... hehe :D

Fant ut at man glemmer mye på ett år uten engelsk!

Gruer meg nesten litt til å ha det neste år igjen!

Once upon a time .... farm outside of London. (er usikker, men tror det skal være en of der)

But Victoria didn't want (tror det blir slik, Victoria er hunnkjønn entall, flertall får wanted om jeg husker rett :P)

-The dream did come true, thought Victoria to herself. But she started wondering if it only was a coincidence or not.

Nei, nå var det lenge siden jeg hadde hatt engelsk gitt :P Men den siste tror jeg bare er en "slurvefeil" fra din side..

Veldig søt historie, man skjønner utfallet, men sånn er det jo i eventyr...

Du kan få kommentarer på at i eventyr er det tre ting som skjer, da tenker jeg på tre ønsker, men feen kommer jo tre ganger så da har du jo "oppveiet" det...

Skulle historien være irsk burde du plassere huset et sted i irland, for å relaterte mer til Irland i din historie :P

Søt historie :P

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tusen takk:D skal ikke mange slurevefeilene til for å gå ned en hel karakter, så :D

Jeg valgte forøvrig å ta 2 ønsker fordi irsk fortelling ikke skal være som eventyr. Er redd det hadde blitt for eventyr-aktig om jeg hadde tatt 3 ønsker, en fe som kommer 3 ganger, once upon a time osv osv. :P

tusen takk!

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tusen takk:D skal ikke mange slurevefeilene til for å gå ned en hel karakter, så :D

Jeg valgte forøvrig å ta 2 ønsker fordi irsk fortelling ikke skal være som eventyr. Er redd det hadde blitt for eventyr-aktig om jeg hadde tatt 3 ønsker, en fe som kommer 3 ganger, once upon a time osv osv. :P

tusen takk!

Åh... heheh. Trodde du mente at fortellingen skulle være fra Irland jeg!

Hihih, har ikke hørt om irsk fortelling før jeg :P

Du får se på det jeg skrev og se om du er enig, det er leeenge siden jeg har skrevet engelsk nå!

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I have a dream - By Birte 9d

Once upon a time there was a poor family living in a basement apartment on a farm outside of London.

The mother and father were working on the farm, but they only got enough money for food, and to pay (for=bort med den) the overprised rent.

They also had a daughter named Victoria. Victoria had long, blond hair with curls all over (it=bort med den).

Because of the low wages the mother and father gained, they couldn't afford to get her an education.

And since they lived on a farm far away from the civilization, she didn't have any friends either.

She was very miserable, and there was nothing anyone could do about it.

Her parents taught her how to be a good farmer like they were, but Victoria didn't wanted

to become a farmer, her dream was to become a famous actress some day. Although she wasn't very optimistic, she

prayed every night. Hoping something, or someone, would get her away from this living hell.

Victoria came home from working outside at the farm, and she was exhausted! She walked into her bedroom, sat down by

the bed, and prayed to God that he would help her. But, as always, nothing happened.

She layed down on her bed crying, and suddenly, from out of nowhere, a fairy appeared.

It was a gorgeous fairy, with a long white dress with purple flowers on it. The fairy held a magic wand in

her right hand and out of it, there came lots of gold and silvered glitter.

Victoria didn't believe her own eyes.

-Dont be afraid, I've comed to grant you two wishes, the fairy said kindly.

Victoria still couldn't believe it. She rubbed her eyes to make sure if it was a dream or not.

But it wasn't. The fairy was still to see.

-Two wishes, you said? Victoria was shaken in her voice and body.

-Yes, I've seen how miserable you are, and you deserve so much better, sweetheart.

-ooh.. This is like a dream come true! Victoria had a big smile all around her face. You could even se her nose smiling.

But before Victoria got a chance to say her wish, someone woke her up.

-Victoria! Dinner's ready! It was her mother.

Victoria realized that everything had been a dream, and it crushed her heart.

-Like I needed that, she thought to herself and went into the livingroom to eat her daily bowl of vegetable soup.

The sun set, and the birds stopped cherping. Victoria crawled in under her duvet, and just as she fell asleep,

the fairy came back.

-Hello my dear. I've comed back to grant you your two wishes. The fairy smiled and spun her magic wand.

Even though Victoria didn't believe it, she said her first wish, which was a raise for her parents.

-Your wish will come true, the fairy said as she spun her magic wand in slow sircles around Victorias head.

The next morning Victorias mum came in to the kitchen with a great smile on her face.

-What are you so happy about?, Victoria asked with a stupid expression on her face. She hadn't seen her mother smile

like that in ages.

-You will never believe this. I've gotten a raise!

-Wow, that's great, mother! Victoria was shocked. She and her parents gathered and they all hugged at once.

Finally, something good happened to the poor family.

-The dream did come true, thought Victoria to herself. But she started wondering if it was only a coincidence.

This whole day Victoria had a feeling of happiness inside. A feeling she didn't even remembered having felt before.

The day went on, and she couldn't wait for the next night to come, hoping the fairy would show up.

And when the evening came, she fell asleep right away. But the next day she woke up, without any memories of a dream.

-Maybe it was a coincidence afterall. Victoria was deeply dissapointed.

Days and nights went by. Still no dreams. After a while she gave up the thought of the fairy to return and give

her her remaining wish. But the same night, the fairy showed up.

-Hello dear. I've been very busy lately, I'm afraid. But of course you should get the last wish I've promised you.

Victoria looked up from her duvet and saw the beautiful fairy.

-Ok, here's my last wish. I've been thinking about it since the first time you came to me! And now, I've decided that

this is what I want to do.

Victoria said her wish, the fairy spun her magic wand and they both dissapeared.

Now, Victoria has the best job she could ever imagine. Even better than to be an actress.

Every night, she flyes all around the world, making miserable people happy. She even has a white long dress with purple

flowers on it, and she always bring her magic wand with sparkling glitter coming out of it.

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Åh... heheh. Trodde du mente at fortellingen skulle være fra Irland jeg!

Hihih, har ikke hørt om irsk fortelling før jeg :icon_redface:

Du får se på det jeg skrev og se om du er enig, det er leeenge siden jeg har skrevet engelsk nå!

hehe, har forøvrig aldri hørt om det selv heller:p fikk bare vite at vi skulle skrive noe på engelsk, realistisk men samtidig overnaturlig.. Språket skulle være litt pent, men det har ikke jeg tenkt så mye på.. hehe. Ellers skulle jeg bare skrive en normal stil, med litt eventyr trekk her og der.. :o

Hvorfor det heter akkurat irsk fortelling aner jeg ikke, tror det har noe med måten de skriver på der..

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har da fått oppgave å skrive en irsk fortelling, (hva det nå måtte være.) og her er resultatet :icon_redface:

I have a dream - By Birte 9d

Once upon a time there was a poor family living (who lived) in a basement on a farm outside London.

The mother and father were working on the farm, but they only got enough money for food and to pay for the (their) overprised rent.

They also had a daughter named Victoria. Victoria had long, curly blond hair.

Because of the low wages the mother and father gained, they couldn't afford her education. (du trenger ikke an)

And since they lived on a farm far away from the civilization she didnt have any friends either.

She was very miserable, and (er but bedre her?) there was nothing no one could do about it.

Her parents taught her how to be a good farmer as they were (her parents taught her to be the great farmers they were). But Victoria didn't want

to become a farmer, her dream was to become a famous actress some day. Allthough she wasn't very (werent too) optimistic, she

prayed every night hoping something or someone would get her away from this living hell.

(she prayed every night in the hope that something or someone could get...)

Victoria came home from working out at the farm, and she was exhausted! She got into her bedroom, and sat down by

the bed and prayed to God that he would help her. But as always, nothing happened.

She layed down on her bed crying (to cry), and suddenly, out of nowhere, a fairy appeared.

It was a gorgeous fairy, in a long white dress with purple flowers on. The fairy held a magic (ville bare skrevet wand, at det er en magisk tryllestav blir litt overstatement) wand in

her right (hadde kuttet den og) hand (shooting gold and silver sprinkles)and out of it, there came lots of gold and silvered glitter.

Victoria didn't believe her own eyes.

-Dont be afraid, I've (I came to give)comed to grant you two wishes, the fairy said kindly.

Victoria still couldn't believe it. She rubbed her eyes to make sure if it (this istedenfor it) was a dream or not.

But it wasn't. The fairy was still to see. (were still there)

-Two wishes, you said? Victoria was shaken in her voice and body. (shook both in her...)

-Yes, I've seen how miserable you are and (I think) you deserve so much better, sweetheart.

-ooh.. This is like a dream come true! Victoria had a big smile all around her face. You could even see her nose smiling.

But before Victoria got a chance to say her wish, someone (something) woke her up.

-Victoria! Dinners ready! It was her mother.

Victoria realized that everything had been a dream, and it crushed her heart. (and it crushed her.)

-Like I needed that, she thought to herself (as she) went into the livingroom to eat her daily cup of vegetablesoup.

The sun went down, and the birds stopped kvittering tittering. Victoria crawled in under her duvet, and just as she fell asleep,

the fairy came back.

-Hello my dear. I've comed (enten I came, eller I have come) back to grant you your two wishes. The fairy smiled and spun her magic wand.

Even though Victoria didn't believe it, she said (isteden for said kan du skrive she told the fairy) her first wish, which was a raise for her parents.

-Your wish will come true, the fairy said as she spun her magic wand in slow sircles around Victorias head.

The next morning Victorias mum came into the kitchen with a great smile on her face.

-What are you so happy about?, Victoria asked with a stupid expression on her face. She hadn't seen her mother smile

like that in ages.

-You will never believe this. I've got a raise!

-Wow, that's great, mother! Victoria was shocked. She and her parents gathered and they all hugged. (unødvendig å si at de klemte samtidig)

Finally, something good happened to the (her kan du skrive this isteden, litt usikker på hvem som sier dette) poor family.

-The dream did come true, thought Victoria (victoria thought) to herself. But she started wondering if it only was a coincident or not.

This whole day Victoria had a feeling of happiness inside. (victoria felt happy the whole day, a feeling she barely remembered having felt before.) A feeling she didn't even remembered having felt before.

The day went on, and (as the day went on she couldnt wait for nightfall) she couldn't wait for the next night to come, hoping the fairy would show up. (again)

And (stryk hvis du bruker den andre setningen) when the evening (finally) came, she fell asleep right away. But the next day she woke up, without any memories of a dream.

-Maybe it was a coincident afterall. Victoria was deeply dissapointed.

Days and nights went by. Still no dreams. After a while she gave up the thought of the fairy to return and (to istedenfor and) give

her her (the isteden for her) remaining wish. But the same night, the fairy showed up.

-Hello dear. I've been very busy lately, I'm afraid. But of course you should get the last wish I've promised you.

Victoria looked up from her duvet and saw the beautiful fairy.

-Ok, here's my last wish. I've been thinking about it since the first time you came to me! And now, I've decided that

this is what I want to do.

Victoria said her wish, the fairy spun her magic wand and they both dissapeared.

Now, Victoria have the best job she could ever imagine. Even better than to be an actress.

Every night, she flies all around the world, making miserable people happy. She even has a white dress with purple

flowers, and she always brings her magic wand (shooting sparkling glitter) with sparkling glitter coming out of it.

--------------------

hvis du orket å lese hele, setter jeg veldig stor pris på om noen med litt mer engelskunnskaper enn meg kunne pirket litt :o Både på ord og sammensetninger av ord.. takk på forhånd :o I really appreciate it

Suset sikkert litt siden jeg strengt tatt burde sove nå, men liker å pirke :o

Håper du ikke blir gretten over at jeg overpirker noen ganger, synes det var en søt historie!

Men hvis du skriver ny versjon her, så kan jeg gjerne pirke litt til når jeg er våken og engasjert, er en av mine yndlingstidsfordrivelser..)

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Suset sikkert litt siden jeg strengt tatt burde sove nå, men liker å pirke :o

Håper du ikke blir gretten over at jeg overpirker noen ganger, synes det var en søt historie!

Men hvis du skriver ny versjon her, så kan jeg gjerne pirke litt til når jeg er våken og engasjert, er en av mine yndlingstidsfordrivelser..)

Gretten, nei :o er ikke annet enn takknemlig jeg nå :icon_redface: Pirk ivei!

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med ny versjon regner jeg med at du tenker på et andreutkast, eller? :o

Nå har jeg hvert fall sett over den et par ganger, og rettet opp i endel feil..

-----

I have a dream - By Birte 9d

Once upon a time there was a poor family who lived in a basement apartment on a farm outside of London.

The mother and father were working on the farm, but they only got enough money for food and to pay their overpriced rent.

They also had a daughter named Victoria. Victoria had long, curly blond hair.

Because of the low wages the mother and father gained, they couldn't afford to get her an education. And since they lived on a farm far away from the civilization she didn’t have any friends either.

She was very miserable, but there was nothing anyone could do about it.

Her parents taught her how to be a good farmer like they were, but Victoria didn't want

To become a farmer, her dream was to become a famous actress some day. Although she weren’t too optimistic, she prayed every night in the hope that something, or someone, would get her away from this living hell.

Victoria came home from working out at the farm, and she was exhausted! She walked into her bedroom, sat down by the bed, and prayed to God that he would help her. But as always, nothing happened.

She lay down on her bed crying, and suddenly, from out of nowhere, a fairy appeared.

It was a gorgeous fairy, in a long white dress with purple flowers on it. The fairy held a magic wand in her hand and out of it, there came lots of gold and silvered glitter.

Victoria didn't believe her own eyes.

-Don’t be afraid, I came to grant you two wishes, the fairy said kindly.

Victoria still couldn't believe it. She rubbed her eyes to make sure if it was a dream or not.

But it wasn't. The fairy was still there.

-Two wishes, you said? Victoria was shaken in her voice and body.

-Yes, I've seen how miserable you are I think you deserve so much better, sweetheart.

-Oh. This is like a dream come true! Victoria had a big smile all around her face. You could even se her nose smiling.

But before Victoria got a chance to say her wish, something woke her up.

-Victoria! Dinner’s ready! It was her mother.

Victoria realized that everything had been a dream, and it crushed her heart.

-Like I needed that, she thought to herself as she went into the living room to eat her daily cup of vegetable soup.

The sun set, and the birds stopped twittering. Victoria crawled in under her duvet, and just as she fell asleep, the fairy came back.

-Hello my dear. I came back to grant you your two wishes. The fairy smiled and spun her magic wand. Even though Victoria didn't believe it, she told the fairy her first wish, which was a raise for her parents.

-Your wish will come true, the fairy said as she spun her magic wand in slow circles around Victoria’s head.

The next morning Victoria’s mum came into the kitchen with a great smile on her face.

-What are you so happy about? Victoria asked with a stupid expression on her face. She hadn't seen her mother smile like that in ages.

-You will never believe this. I've got a raise!

-Wow, that's great, mother! Victoria was shocked. She and her parents gathered and they all hugged. Finally, something good happened to this poor family.

-The dream did come true, Victoria thought to herself. But she started wondering if it only was a coincident or not.

Victoria felt happy the whole day, a feeling she barely remembered having felt before.

As the day went on she couldn’t wait for nightfall, hoping the fairy would show up again.

And when the evening finally came, she fell asleep right away. But the next day she woke up, without any memories of a dream.

-Maybe it was a coincident after all. Victoria was deeply disappointed.

Days and nights went by, still no dreams. After a while she gave up the thought of the fairy to return to give her the remaining wish. But the same night, the fairy showed up.

-Hello dear. I've been very busy lately, I'm afraid. But of course you should get the last wish I've promised you.

Victoria looked up from her duvet and saw the beautiful fairy.

-Ok, here's my last wish. I've been thinking about it since the first time you came to me! And now, I've decided that this is what I want to do.

Victoria said her wish, the fairy spun her magic wand and they both disappeared.

Now, Victoria has the best job she could ever imagine, even better than being an actress.

Every night, she flies all around the world, making miserable people happy. She even has a white dress with purple flowers, and she always brings her magic wand, shooting sparkling glitter.

----

pirk så mye du bare orker :icon_redface:

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med ny versjon regner jeg med at du tenker på et andreutkast, eller? :o

Nå har jeg hvert fall sett over den et par ganger, og rettet opp i endel feil..

-----

I have a dream - By Birte 9d

Once upon a time there was a poor family who lived in a basement apartment on a farm outside of London.

The mother and father were working on the farm, but they only got enough money for food and to pay their overpriced rent. (dette er bare en skjønnhetsfeil, men hvis det er en mor og en far blir det unødvendig å si at de også hadde en datter. Foreslår fx. The family all worked on the farm, but even so they only got enough money to pay for food and their overpriced rent. The only child in this family was named Victoria and she was a beautiful child with long, curly blond hair.)

They also had a daughter named Victoria. Victoria had long, curly blond hair.

Because of the low wages the mother and father gained, they couldn't afford to get her an education. And since they lived on a farm far away from the civilization she didn’t have any friends either.

She was very miserable, but there was nothing anyone could do about it.

Her parents taught her how to be a good farmer like they were, but Victoria didn't want to become a farmer, her dream was to become (du trenger bare bruke be) a famous actress some day. Although she weren’t too optimistic, she prayed every night in the hope that something, or someone, would get her away (evt. out) from this living hell.

Victoria came home from working out at the farm, and she was (eller completely) exhausted! She walked into her bedroom, sat down by the bed, and prayed to God that he would help her. But as always, nothing happened.

She lay down on her bed crying, and suddenly, from out of nowhere, a fairy appeared.

It was a gorgeous fairy, in a long white dress with purple flowers on it. The fairy held a magic wand in her hand and out of it, there came lots of gold and silvered glitter.

Victoria didn't believe her own eyes. (du kan også skrive hardly belived)

-Don’t be afraid, I came to grant you two wishes, the fairy said kindly.

Victoria still couldn't believe it. She rubbed her eyes to make sure if it was a dream or not.

But it wasn't. The fairy was still there.

-Two wishes, you said? Victoria was shaken (isteden for was shaken ville jeg skrevet shook, blir var rystende istedenfor ristet, dårlig forklart) in her voice and body.

-Yes, I've seen how miserable you are I think you deserve so much better, sweetheart.

-Oh. This is like a dream come true! Victoria had a big smile all around her face. You could even se her nose smiling. (Evt. Victorias face lit up.)

But before Victoria got a chance to say her wish, something woke her up.

-Victoria! Dinner’s ready! It was her mother.

Victoria realized that everything had been a dream, and it crushed her heart. (and it crushed her.)

-Like I needed that, she thought to herself as she went into the living room to eat her daily cup of vegetable soup.

The sun set, and the birds stopped twittering. Victoria crawled in under her duvet, (evt. Victoria fell on her bed) and just as she fell asleep, the fairy came back.

-Hello my dear. I came back to grant you your two wishes. The fairy smiled and spun her magic wand. Even though Victoria didn't believe it, she told the fairy her first wish, which was a raise for her parents. (ønsker hun mer lønn for begge foreldrene eller bare en? hvis det er begge må moren svare we got a raise, hvis ikke må hun bare ønske lønn til moren.)

-Your wish will come true, the fairy said as she spun her magic wand in slow circles around Victoria’s head.

The next morning Victoria’s mum came into the kitchen with a great smile on her face.

-What are you so happy about? Victoria asked with a stupid expression on her face. She hadn't seen her mother smile like that in ages.

-You will never believe this. I've got a raise!

-Wow, that's great, mother! Victoria was shocked. She and her parents gathered and they all hugged. Finally, something good happened to this poor family.

-The dream did come true, Victoria thought to herself. But she started wondering if it only was a coincident or not.

Victoria felt happy the whole day, a feeling she barely remembered having felt before.

As the day went on she couldn’t wait for nightfall, hoping the fairy would show up again.

And (ville kuttet and) when the evening finally came, she fell asleep right away. But the next day she woke up, without any memories of a dream.

-Maybe it was a coincident after all. Victoria was deeply disappointed.

Days and nights went by, still no dreams. After a while she gave up the thought of the fairy to return to give her the remaining wish. But the same night, the fairy showed up. (dette er pirk, men hun ser ikke feen før hun ser opp fra dynen, så hun kan bli vekket av en stemme eller se henne med en gang hun kommer. du trenger egentlig ikke gjøre noe med dette, men kanskje greit å vite.)

-Hello dear. I've been very busy lately, I'm afraid. But of course you should get the last wish I've promised you.

Victoria looked up from her duvet and saw the beautiful fairy.

-Ok, here's my last wish. I've been thinking about it since the first time you came to me! And now, I've decided that this is what I want to do.

Victoria said her wish, the fairy spun her magic wand and they both disappeared.

Now, Victoria has the best job she could ever imagine, even better than being an actress.

Every night, she flies all around the world, making miserable people happy. She even has a white dress with purple flowers, and she always brings her magic wand, shooting sparkling glitter. (ville strøket even, da det blir litt mer avsluttende.)

----

pirk så mye du bare orker :icon_redface:

My work here is done :o

Men kan jeg se siste utkastet?

synes du er flink jeg! klikk på deg!

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Må pirke litt på meg selv nå... (She never stops!!! :icon_redface::o )

første skrev jeg was named victoria and she was

Litt usikker på was og were, klarte meg liksom på flyt og uttale, ikke gramatikk.

Og du må ta dette som forslag, du har få klare feil, men du kan prøve å få historien til å flyte litt bedre og der hopper forslagene inn. Men ta de for det de er, har ikke master i engelsk...

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Må pirke litt på meg selv nå... (She never stops!!! :icon_redface::o )

første skrev jeg was named victoria and she was

Litt usikker på was og were, klarte meg liksom på flyt og uttale, ikke gramatikk.

Og du må ta dette som forslag, du har få klare feil, men du kan prøve å få historien til å flyte litt bedre og der hopper forslagene inn. Men ta de for det de er, har ikke master i engelsk...

hehe.. er det ikke noe sånt da: I was, you were, he she it was, we were, you were, they were? :o

EDIT: oisann, først nå la jeg merke til rettingene dine innimellom.. Skal fikse på det, så legger jeg inn siste utkast:)

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I have a dream - By Birte 9d

Once upon a time there was a poor family who lived in a basement apartment on a farm outside of London. The family all worked on the farm, but even so they only got enough money to pay for food, and their overpriced rent. The only child in this family was named Victoria and she was a beautiful child with long, curly blond hair.

Because of the low wages the mother and father gained, they couldn't afford to get her an education. And since they lived on a farm far away from the civilization she didn’t have any friends either.

She was very miserable, but there was nothing anyone could do about it.

Her parents taught her how to be a good farmer like they were, but Victoria didn't want

To become a farmer, her dream was to be a famous actress some day. Although she weren’t too optimistic, she prayed every night in the hope that something, or someone, would get her out from this living hell.

Victoria came home from working out at the farm, and she was completely exhausted! She walked into her bedroom, sat down by the bed, and prayed to God that he would help her. But as always, nothing happened.

She lay down on her bed crying, and suddenly, from out of nowhere, a fairy appeared.

It was a gorgeous fairy, in a long white dress with purple flowers on it. The fairy held a magic wand in her hand and out of it, there came lots of gold and silvered glitter.

Victoria hardly believed her own eyes.

-Don’t be afraid, I came to grant you two wishes, the fairy said kindly.

Victoria still couldn't believe it. She rubbed her eyes to make sure if it was a dream or not.

But it wasn't. The fairy was still there.

-Two wishes, you said? Victoria was shook in her voice and body.

-Yes, I've seen how miserable you are I think you deserve so much better, sweetheart.

-Oh. This is like a dream come true! Victoria’s face lit up. You could even se her nose smile.

But before Victoria got a chance to say her wish, something woke her up.

-Victoria! Dinner’s ready! It was her mother.

Victoria realized that everything had been a dream, and it crushed her.

-Like I needed that, she thought to herself as she went into the living room to eat her daily cup of vegetable soup.

The sun set, and the birds stopped twittering. Victoria crawled in under her duvet, and just as she fell asleep, the fairy came back.

-Hello my dear. I came back to grant you your two wishes. The fairy smiled and spun her magic wand. Even though Victoria didn't believe it, she told the fairy her first wish, which was a raise for her parents.

-Your wish will come true, the fairy said as she spun her magic wand in slow circles around Victoria’s head.

The next morning Victoria’s mum came into the kitchen with a great smile on her face.

-What are you so happy about? Victoria asked with a stupid expression on her face. She hadn't seen her mother smile like that in ages.

-You will never believe this. We got a raise!

-Wow, that's great, mother! Victoria was shocked. She and her parents gathered and they all hugged. Finally, something good happened to this poor family.

-The dream did come true, Victoria thought to herself. But she started wondering if it only was a coincident or not.

Victoria felt happy the whole day, a feeling she barely remembered having felt before.

As the day went on she couldn’t wait for nightfall, hoping the fairy would show up again.

When the evening finally came, she fell asleep right away. But the next day she woke up, without any memories of a dream.

-Maybe it was a coincident after all. Victoria was deeply disappointed.

Days and nights went by, still no dreams. After a while she gave up the thought of the fairy to return to give her the remaining wish. But the same night, the fairy showed up.

-Hello dear. I've been very busy lately, I'm afraid. But of course you should get the last wish I've promised you. Victoria looked up from her duvet and saw the beautiful fairy.

-Ok, here's my last wish. I've been thinking about it since the first time you came to me. And now, I've decided that this is what I want to do!

Victoria said her wish, the fairy spun her magic wand and they both disappeared.

Now, Victoria has the best job she could ever imagine, even better than being an actress.

Every night, she flies all around the world, making miserable people happy. She has a white dress with purple flowers, and she always brings her magic wand, shooting sparkling glitter.

------

Slik :icon_redface: Må bare takke enda en gang! utrolig snilt av deg. Kan tenke meg du er passe lei av å lese den historien der nå :o

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I have a dream - By Birte 9d

Once upon a time there was a poor family who lived in a basement apartment on a farm outside of London. The family all worked on the farm, but even so they only got enough money to pay for food, and their overpriced rent. The only child in this family was named Victoria and she was a beautiful child with long, curly blond hair.

Because of the low wages the mother and father gained, they couldn't afford to get her an education. And since they lived on a farm far away from the civilization she didn’t have any friends either.

She was very miserable, but there was nothing anyone could do about it.

Her parents taught her how to be a good farmer like they were, but Victoria didn't want

To become a farmer, her dream was to be a famous actress some day. Although she weren’t too optimistic, she prayed every night in the hope that something, or someone, would get her out from this living hell.

Victoria came home from working out at the farm, and she was completely exhausted! She walked into her bedroom, sat down by the bed, and prayed to God that he would help her. But as always, nothing happened.

She lay down on her bed crying, and suddenly, from out of nowhere, a fairy appeared.

It was a gorgeous fairy, in a long white dress with purple flowers on it. The fairy held a magic wand in her hand and out of it, there came lots of gold and silvered glitter.

Victoria hardly believed her own eyes.

-Don’t be afraid, I came to grant you two wishes, the fairy said kindly.

Victoria still couldn't believe it. She rubbed her eyes to make sure if it was a dream or not.

But it wasn't. The fairy was still there.

-Two wishes, you said? Victoria was shook in her voice and body.

-Yes, I've seen how miserable you are I think you deserve so much better, sweetheart.

-Oh. This is like a dream come true! Victoria’s face lit up. You could even se her nose smile.

But before Victoria got a chance to say her wish, something woke her up.

-Victoria! Dinner’s ready! It was her mother.

Victoria realized that everything had been a dream, and it crushed her.

-Like I needed that, she thought to herself as she went into the living room to eat her daily cup of vegetable soup.

The sun set, and the birds stopped twittering. Victoria crawled in under her duvet, and just as she fell asleep, the fairy came back.

-Hello my dear. I came back to grant you your two wishes. The fairy smiled and spun her magic wand. Even though Victoria didn't believe it, she told the fairy her first wish, which was a raise for her parents.

-Your wish will come true, the fairy said as she spun her magic wand in slow circles around Victoria’s head.

The next morning Victoria’s mum came into the kitchen with a great smile on her face.

-What are you so happy about? Victoria asked with a stupid expression on her face. She hadn't seen her mother smile like that in ages.

-You will never believe this. We got a raise!

-Wow, that's great, mother! Victoria was shocked. She and her parents gathered and they all hugged. Finally, something good happened to this poor family.

-The dream did come true, Victoria thought to herself. But she started wondering if it only was a coincident or not.

Victoria felt happy the whole day, a feeling she barely remembered having felt before.

As the day went on she couldn’t wait for nightfall, hoping the fairy would show up again.

When the evening finally came, she fell asleep right away. But the next day she woke up, without any memories of a dream.

-Maybe it was a coincident after all. Victoria was deeply disappointed.

Days and nights went by, still no dreams. After a while she gave up the thought of the fairy to return to give her the remaining wish. But the same night, the fairy showed up.

-Hello dear. I've been very busy lately, I'm afraid. But of course you should get the last wish I've promised you. Victoria looked up from her duvet and saw the beautiful fairy.

-Ok, here's my last wish. I've been thinking about it since the first time you came to me. And now, I've decided that this is what I want to do!

Victoria said her wish, the fairy spun her magic wand and they both disappeared.

Now, Victoria has the best job she could ever imagine, even better than being an actress.

Every night, she flies all around the world, making miserable people happy. She has a white dress with purple flowers, and she always brings her magic wand, shooting sparkling glitter.

------

Slik :o Må bare takke enda en gang! utrolig snilt av deg. Kan tenke meg du er passe lei av å lese den historien der nå :o

Må bare pirke en allersiste gang..

but Victoria didn't want

To become a farmer, her dream was to be a famous actress some day

Ikke stor bokstav uten punktum :icon_redface:

Victoria was shook in her voice and body.

Victoria shook, was shook blir feil.

Og det resterende; Sheer perfection :o

Og synes bare det er gøy, elsker å pirke!

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Må bare pirke en allersiste gang..

but Victoria didn't want

To become a farmer, her dream was to be a famous actress some day

Ikke stor bokstav uten punktum :o

Victoria was shook in her voice and body.

Victoria shook, was shook blir feil.

Og det resterende; Sheer perfection :o

Og synes bare det er gøy, elsker å pirke!

den T'en hadde det skjedd noe med ja :o hehe..

Men hvordan blir resten av setningen der da? Victoria shook..... ? eller skulle det ikke stå noe mer der?

siden du elsker pirking, ville jeg ikke sett bort ifra at det kommer en ny tråd som denne en gang jeg trenger det :icon_redface:

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Victoria shook in her...

Evt. victoria shook in both her...

Tror jeg stemmer på den øverste, det var bare was som var unødvendig.

Og bare send flere :icon_redface:

Er kanskje litt sær, men synes det er fantastisk gøy!

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Utdanner meg til lærer i kunst og håndtverk, og har jobbet som ridelærer, så du gjettet litt riktig :o

Kan ikke gramatikk for fem flate øre, så holder meg nok til tegningen. Mye pirking der og... :icon_redface:

hehe.. Pirking er det som skal til :o

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